Easing the Pain
It is never easy to watch a loved one suffer or witness their pain. Try as we might to fix the problems, it simply is not that easy. Oh, how I wish that it were.
My father was recently diagnosed with cancer and this has hit all of my family very hard. It has been difficult to digest this information and to see him in pain. My father is the strongest man I know. He is always the first to lend a helping hand and an honest opinion (whether you want it or not! LOL). He has always been my hero and I have seen him bounce back from heart attacks and strokes over the course of my life. I know he is strong enough to pull through this as well. I just wish that I had that magic wand to speed up that process.
I’ve helped many friends and clients through similar situations. With them, it has been second nature to be objective and define the boundaries between emotional connection and the role of healer for me. With my Dad, I find these boundaries blurred at best, and all I want for him is to be peaceful and well.
I had the luxury of spending time with him this past week and was so reminded of all the reasons I love him so much. His stories of his life growing up on the farm in Iowa with his brothers and sisters always captivate me. I sat by his side and listened as he recounted on one adventure to the next and then to the hard times when his father lost everything in the depression. His physical body may be weak right now, but his mind and memory remain strong. On the plane ride home I thought of how grateful I was to visit and started planning my next trip to see him.
Once home, the deep sadness I had not allowed myself to feel sunk in. While sitting in my office, I openly asked aloud what am I to do? What is the best way to help? How can I make this better? My fingers began flying across my keyboard as a message came through. Many times when I channel, it is spontaneous like this. I share this message with you now, hoping that it gives comfort to others in similar situations. It offered me a higher perspective that has guided me to be in a better place.
Oh, how your heart aches! You watch as those you love are in pain and you know not what to do to change this. It is not your duty nor is it your mission to solve this. You can only do what is humanly possible to keep their level of comfort tolerable. You can only do what as a soul is possible by sending them love and light every moment of the day; every time they pass through your thoughts.
To stress over the situation is but a waste of energy. We know that you know this, but it is time for a reminder. It is time to remember that your time and your energy is better spent in other areas of life. Worrying over what may or may not happen does not prevent the occurrence. In fact, to focus upon such negativity only draws such things closer to you.
Work hard at being in the moment. When bad news comes, allow yourself to digest the information. Think also at this time of things you are still grateful for. When a loved one is given a diagnosis that is not favorable, this does not mean it is the end. This is an orchestrated process that the soul chooses to experience. As hard as that may seem to be true, it really is. And on a soul level, you understand this.
You have choices! You always have choices! It is up to you how you act and react. It is up to you if you wish for petty issues to clog your mind and distract you from the issue at hand. It is up to you to decide to stay in bed all day and manifest the sadness within the physical. There is no judgment here. You must feel what you choose to feel. This is your process, just as it is your loved one’s process to go through the health challenge.
People come together during these times or they choose to detach and go off on their separate ways. It is much easier to face these situations with a group than it is with just an individual. A group can focus their energies and their will on positive actions, and this is much stronger than trying to do this alone. Think of what is most important, right now, within this moment. Is it the falling out with a family member years ago, or is it focusing on the wishes and comfort of those who are ill?
Think long and hard about your choices, your decisions and your actions. If you were to look back in time on this moment ten years from now, would you be happy with what you are doing? If you answer yes to this question, please continue down this path. If there is any hesitancy in answering yes, then perhaps it is time to rethink your actions.
Life presents you with these experiences so that you may take the time to truly inventory what is most important. This moment may pass, but the impact you make within that moment will last forever.
May all your moments today be filled with joy,